


Beauty and Love

by rangerofdiscord



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Abuse Mentions, Alcoholism implied, Body Horror, F/M, NSFW
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-05
Updated: 2015-12-05
Packaged: 2018-05-05 01:23:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 948
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5355689
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rangerofdiscord/pseuds/rangerofdiscord
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>By no means is Allison considered conventionally beautiful, yet to Leonard not a single thing in the universe could compare to her beauty. To Leonard, love is a very real thing that people feel, but yet Allison doesn't believe that she can actually feel it. A short lil drabble set in their different POV's about the two subjects.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Beauty and Love

Allison was by no means conventionally beautiful. Her hair was constantly a mess, knotted and tangled in a messy bun or ponytail. Her nose was wide and flat, eyes spread a bit too far apart and her face was covered in freckles. She had no real curves to speak of, she was stocky and muscular with a flat chest and thighs that could kill a man. Specifically any man who dared touch her without her permission. 

Scars littered her body. From the pale white scars in the shapes of wings on her back, to the ugly, rough burn marks on her thighs. One large, particularly rough scar was on her upper stomach, circular and jagged. Over her crotch and across her uterus was the scar from the emergency C-section, a dark reminder to both of them how close she had come to dying that night. 

She was scarred, beaten and in no way shape or form beautiful to most people. Yet to Leonard Church she was the most beautiful things in the universe. Nothing could compare. Not even the beauty and mystery of space, with all of it's bright, colorful nebulae, galaxies, clusters of stars, could hold a candle to her. 

And how could it? In every sense of the way she was beautiful to him. From the way her bright blue eyes, the color of the sky over the ocean on a sunny day, glared at him when he made a joke to piss her off to the way she'd push her bottom lip down into a pout when she didn't get what she wanted. 

Her beauty was in the way her laughs would turn into a loud snort, the way sweat would roll down her body when she was working out. It was in the way her eyes rolled in the back of her head when she was close, the way her lips would be in a perfect o-shape as he thrust into her, the perfect, desperate sound she made when she was right on the edge but he forced her to wait. It was how her body felt as it tensed around him, how for just a few moments every now and then he could make her his. If only for a few short moments, that never lasted as long as he wanted. 

To anyone else, Allison was just another woman. She was ordinary, not necessarily beautiful. But to Leonard, she was his whole world. And to him, his whole world was more gorgeous than anything else. 

 

Love was a difficult subject for Allison. After long arguments with Leonard, that more often than not ended up in him just throwing something at the wall, she finally admitted that love was a real emotion people felt towards one another. She just never felt it. 

It was less that she couldn't feel love and more that she chose not to. Early on in her life, she learned that living in a time of war meant that just because you loved someone didn't mean they'd always be there. In fact, more often that not, when it came to Allison, loving someone meant she never saw them again. 

So she stopped letting herself love people. She closed herself off to the world, figuring it was better that way. Better that people think she was an emotionless robot than to lose them and deal with the crippling heartbreak. 

But if she did love anyone, it was Leonard. No one in her life had ever made an effort as he did to get close to her, and when he discovered the things about herself that she was sure he'd leave her over, he didn't leave. He stayed, and held her close and swore to be there for her through everything. 

The gesture was so foreign, so strange and rare that she had had no idea what to do. Instead of saying or doing anything back, she just sat there, letting him hold her and after he was done she thanked him and sat down for a long time, trying to process what happened. 

After that, she began to slowly get used to what being loved was like. It meant that when she woke up, someone's arms were around her and they told her how beautiful she was. It meant that throughout the day, Leonard would touch her, stroke her, hold her and remind her how much she meant to him. 

Love was always having someone to come home to, to complain about the day and decompress. It was someone telling her the best way to take care of your sore muscles, someone massaging her shoulders when she was stressed. 

Love wasn't so bad, but like everything else it had it's ups and downs. It wasn't always happiness and peace. Sometimes it meant getting yelled at after she drank herself into her oblivion. Sometimes it meant shouting at Leonard till her voice hurt and all she wanted to do was just beat him till he gave in. There were times when she hated how much he loved her, when she hated the look of pity mixed with love he gave her after she ranted and raged at him about how fucked up she was. 

But for the most part, love was nice. Love was peace, stability. Things she had never known. And eventually, one night, she felt her contract and ache. It was a pain so strong, so overwhelming she nearly fell over. Her body trembled and shook, and it was only when someone reassured her that he would be alright that she felt better. 

At that moment she knew that if she really was capable of loving someone, she loved Leonard.


End file.
